I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up To No Good

[alt_hydra]

I have something to tell everyone.

I've been meaning to bring it up for a while, but I never knew the right time, and it was - it wasn't an easy matter for me to come to terms with, when I found out about what I could do. I tried to make it go away but it didn't work and-

I'm not just an occlumens, I'm also a legilimens. Justin and Sally Anne know. So does Hermione, sort of. I can do the same things Mummy does.

And the reason I'm telling you now is because I know that most of your are worried about what Professor Dolohov saw, and how much he knows.

Well, I can try to find out. It will be dangerous, of course, and it would require careful planning. I don't want him to know what I can do, after all. I don't want anyone to ever know except for us. But I won't do it unless you think I should. And I might need your help, figuring out how to go about it.

I'm sorry I didn't tell you before now.

Comments

[alt_draco]

You can read people's minds? No spell required?

Why would you ever try to make it go away? I realise that the people with that particular gift tend to be extraordinarily mental, and, of late, either maimed or repulsively nose-less, but still - do you know how much this changes things? How much it might even out the pitch?

You ought to have told us.

[alt_hydra]

I know how much it changes things now, but I had to think about it first. For a while.

What I ought to have done doesn't matter now I've told you.

Private message to Hydra

[alt_draco]

What's it like?

Despite your personal feelings on the matter, you must realise that it's a gift that many people would cut off more than a finger for.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

Confusing, mostly. It's like the first time you walk through the castle in the dark. There are staircases that turn and disappear and lead nowhere, and faces that come and go, and random laughter and shouting.

But if you pay attention to can find your way through it.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_draco]

I meant how does it make you feel.

Knowing what others are thinking about you, and how they think of you, and knowing where things stand. It must be comforting, or something. To have absolutes.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

I'm not so sure. People can change their mind at any time, especially when it comes to what they think about other people. It's comforting, yes, but also not.

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_draco]

I suppose they can.

And you know I can occlude, right? So don't come around trying to have a peek at my exquisite grey matter.

Just taking the mick - I know you won't. But don't

Private message to Hermione (and Harry, whatever)

[alt_draco]

Is it really true that you've known?

Why didn't you tell me Harry and me?

Re: Private message to Hermione (and Harry, whatever)

[alt_hermione]

Well, she never said for sure--I mean, she never exactly admitted that she could do it but I suspected for a while. And, well, when I tried to ask her she even denied it for a while, so...I thought I'd wait until she either came to it herself or proved me wrong.

Re: Private message to Hermione (and Harry, whatever)

[alt_draco]

That sounds like a lot of "whiles."

I guess I keep forgetting that you've always had tonnes of secrets that you've kept from Harry and me.

Who do you

Right. That's to be expected - it only makes sense, and is the intelligent thing to do.

[alt_sally_anne]

I can't decide if trying to read Professor Dolohov's mind is a really good idea, or a really bad idea.

There isn't any way he could tell you were doing it, is there?

[alt_hydra]

I don't think so, thought I suppose everyone's different. And he's very skilled in almost everything.

[alt_sally_anne]

He is, but he doesn't know how to occlude. At least, he said he can't, when I asked him about occlumency back in the autumn (because I wanted to learn how to do it and this was before the Order decided to teach all of us.) He has books on it, of course, and he let me borrow some of them.

So it would probably work.

How would we make him think about the right things, without -- I mean if he DOESN'T know it was us and we ask him leading questions like 'how did you enjoy the wedding? anything interesting happen?' he might suddenly realise.

[alt_hydra]

He might think about it without us asking anything. Especially if he does know something, because then it's probably on his mind.

Or, if he saw some of us together, say. Even just me and Justin.

[alt_sally_anne]

That's a good point.

It shouldn't be more than two. You and Justin, or you and me. With a reason to go see him like 'I'd like to borrow a book about...' or something like that.

Have you or Justin ever gone, during his office hours? To chat with him or borrow books?

[alt_hydra]

A few times, and I was with him once. He doesn't go a lot, though.

[alt_sally_anne]

I go I've gone a lot.

So if you want the least suspicious scenario if he DOESN'T know it was us, then the two of us should go together and we should tell him that you've got some new interest in some topic most people don't know much about and I told you that Professor Dolohov would have books about it because he has books about everything and so we came together to see him and get books.

We probably shouldn't ask about horcruxes. That might be a little suspicious in completely different ways. I wonder, though, if he

[alt_hydra]

What would Professor Dolohov have special knowledge of that my parents couldn't answer?

Maybe types of magic that aren't common to England? Something Egyptian.

[alt_sally_anne]

Either Egyptian or Russian magic.

This year, let me try to remember. He's loaned me books about building things and making things (that are magic, I mean), and books about runework. And cursed runework. I suppose you could get anything like that from your father.

Poisons and antidotes. Curses, and undoing curses or mitigating their effects. Magical jewelry. Occlumency. Resisting compulsion magic. Casting compulsion magic. The Healing research underlying the cruciatus spell and its applications in the Healing areas.

Magics you can cast on objects to find out who made them (and obviously this is really about how to make sure that no one knows YOU made it) and then there were a bunch of other books about magic you can use to find stuff out about magic that's been cast on someone or something (and again, how to avoid being detected that way) and concealment magic generally.

Anything there sound promising? I'm probably forgetting some of what we talked about I borrowed.

[alt_hydra]

I don't know what all Mummy and Daddy know or have in their libraries, but hopefully he doesn't, either. I would think they'd have lots of books about curses and jewelry and anything related to objects and concealment.

Probably not so many on healing and antidotes and poisons and things, though - especially if they come from Egypt or Russia.

[alt_sally_anne]

Honestly even if it WAS something your mum would have in her library, I doubt he'd find it all that surprising if you preferred to talk to him instead.

[alt_sally_anne]

But maybe poisons and antidotes? That makes it easy. They're not covered in Potions until NEWTs and you could be curious because, oh, you heard some of the older students talking. You asked me because you know I'm hoping to become a Healer and I said, 'oh, let's go see Professor Dolohov, he has LOADS of books about poisons and antidotes, including all sorts of really unusual and interesting ones that have particularly interesting effects instead of just killing you dead!'

Of course the risk we run if we ask an interesting questions is that he'll be thinking about the answer.

Private Message to Dux

[alt_justin]

Hullo, sweetheart,

I'm quite proud of you, you know. That was very brave.

Love,

-J

Re: Private Message to Dux

[alt_hydra]

Well, no one's cross with me yet at least.

Draco's gone a bit funny, though. He said it must be comforting to know where you stand with everyone, and where others stand on things - I think that's what he meant, anyway. I told him it wasn't quite like that but sometimes I think he hears what he wants to hear.

[alt_harry]

Thanks for telling, Hydra.

That's good to know.

Private message to Hydra

[alt_sally_anne]

Isn't anyone going to tell us it's a bad idea to try to legilimise Dolohov? I was actually kind of hoping

Re: Private message to Hydra

[alt_hydra]

I suppose not?

[alt_ron]

You're a-

What?

[alt_hydra]

Legilimens?

[alt_ron]

Um.

Yeah, okay.

That's

[alt_ron]

I mean, gosh, Hydra.

That'll be dead useful and-


Can you do it without a person knowing you are?

[alt_hydra]

Yes.

[alt_ron]

Um.

Well, isn't that awkward?


A bit.

[alt_hydra]

I haven't done it to you. Only to Justin, Cassie Calderwood, and Madam Umbridge.

Oh, and Remy but that was by accident.

[alt_ron]

By accident?

You mean, you can't- not?

[alt_hydra]

I can now, but that was before I knew it was happening. And it was only because Remy was thinking about me. I kept mistaking that he was talking to me out loud, and then when I answered him, he got spooked, of course.

[alt_neville]

First of all, thanks for telling us. I can appreciate why you would want to keep something like that private, particularly if you had to come to terms with it.

Second, as for the question of trying to legilimise Professor Dolohov. I reckon you need to consider carefully whaddye call 'em, the costs and benefits. You say it could be dangerous. If he could detect it, yeah, that would definitely be bad, and it would certainly rivet his attention.

I know some of you like him, but I get dead uncomfortable whenever he focuses that really hyper-focused attention on me.

On the other hand, what are the benefits? If it's just to ease our minds, well, my Dad always says that growing up means learning to live with uncertainty. But maybe it could give us some valuable information. What that could be, though, I dunno.

Oh, and one other thing. I don't think there's any point on thinking less of people for things about them that they can't help about themselves, and it sounds like that's what legilimancy is for you. On the other hand, what counts is how you use it. You're thinking of using it here to assess danger and protect your friends. That sounds like a decent reason to me--as long as you think it's worth the risk. And unfortunately, I don't really know enough about legilimancy (or Professor Dolohov, for that matter) to be able to judge that.

Uh, I'm not sure that's much help.

[alt_hydra]

Yes, I want to protect my friends.

But to be honest, I also want to see if I can do it. Which might be a bad impulse, maybe.

[alt_sally_anne]

That's not entirely a bad impulse. I mean right now, it's hard to know if it will be useful until you try. But there might come a time when we REALLY need you to do it, and if you haven't practiced it at all, you know, it will be harder.

I think we should. As soon as we can. Before I lose my nerve